


I Feel Like A Hot Pink Bitch Named Breakfast

by Kairaynii00



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Living Together, Other, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:15:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29288910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kairaynii00/pseuds/Kairaynii00
Summary: One shots and Inter-connected one-shots of Dream, Sapnap, and George living together. Super domestic, found family.Chapter 1 - Sapnap brings home a petChapter 2 - Camping gone wrongChapter 3 - Sickfic and Who’s the favoriteChapter 4 - Grocery shopping and traumatizing the localsChapter 5 - How to cookChapter 6 - ?Chapter 7 - ?Chapter 8 - ?Chapter 9 - ?Chapter 10 - ?
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Kudos: 29





	I Feel Like A Hot Pink Bitch Named Breakfast

When George agreed to Dream and Sapnap’s proposition to move into an apartment building in Texas he didn’t expect to be awoken in the middle of the night to the feeling of something licking his elbow. With energy he didn’t know he possessed he screeched at the top of his lungs and threw the blanket off of him. Taking a quick glance to see what the actual fuck was happening his eyes landed on probably the ugliest thing he’d ever seen.   
A wild boar? No, it’s not pig enough...he moved closer slowly, curiosity winning over self-preservation while tons of banging and footsteps could be heard in the room next door. Okay, not a boar. Just a very very dirty dog. By the time he examined the dog closely the loud noises got even louder and the source of them ran through his doorway. It was Dream, fresh out of bed in nothing but a hoodie and sweatpants clutching a child’s sized baseball bat panting for breath.  
“If you ever-“ He paused to take a much needed breath after seeing no immediate danger, “-scream like that again, I’m going to be forced to make you sleep on my floor to ensure I don’t have a heart attack.” Obviously the blonde thought that he was dying from that yell, but Jesus Christ George thought he was being elbow-violated. He’ll scream all he wants, thank you very much.   
“Why. The fuck. Is there a rabid dog in my room...assaulting my elbow at three in the morning?” He asked, voice deadly calm. Noticing the change in demeanor Dream set the bat down and moved further into the room cautiously, before gagging violently.   
“I didn’t put it here! Why the fuck does it smell like that?” He demanded starting to put distance between him and the dog. It turned its head quizzically before decidedly growling at him.  
“I don’t know! Where is Sapnap?” George shouted quickly, deducing who the true culprit was. As if scripted at that exact moment the front door opened casting the dog to dart out of the room. Dream let out a macho screech as the dog ran past him. Both of them left the room after the dog preparing to badger all the info they needed out of the third roomie. What they didn’t expect was to be greeted with the sight of Sapnap sniffling while tears ran down his cheeks.   
“Are you okay?” George asks, always the mom friend.  
“Yeah did the dog hurt you? We. Can get rid of him.” Dream supplies helpfully. George opens his mouth to ask another question but is cut-off by Sapnap loudly professing his sins.  
“I didn’t even see him! He just ran out in front of the car! He’s so cute and now he’s by himself!” He cried, trying to compose himself. Honestly Sapnap liked to pretend he was extremely manly, but he had a huge soft spot for animals. Especially dogs.  
“You hit the dog with your car!” Dream exclaimed unhelpfully. The blunt statement caused Sapnap to burst into another round of tears while he clutches the mangy dog that was licking the tears off his face.   
“Is the dog gonna be okay? Why haven’t you taken it to the vet? Why were you out so late driving?” George asked, clearly irritating Sapnap.   
“I’m not a fucking idiot George! He’s not dying, I just feel bad. No vet will take him unless it’s an emergency at this hour! They all told me to bring him in at seven. And I was hungry so I went to get a burger! Is that a crime now?” He yelled half-joking.   
“Um it is if you almost murdered an ugly dog in the process.” George snarked clearly just ready to go back to bed already with his elbows tucked in. He turned to leave but was stopped by Dream’s hand on his arm.   
“Dude, Sapnap seems really torn up about this. You know how little sleep he’s been getting. It’s hitting him harder than it should. We gotta help him.” He said in a hushed voice while Sapnap was involved with speaking in a baby voice to the dog. George groaned loudly, not ready for any sort of commitment so early in the morning. He honestly would’ve gone back to bed anyway if not for the fact that he knew he’d be kept up by how loud Sapnap and Dream were anyways.   
“Ugh fine.” He muttered, rolling his eyes dramatically. As they walked back over to Sapnap the dog looked at Dream and let out a low growl of warning.   
“What did I do?” He demanded confusion at the reaction. Sapnap continued to pet the dog.   
“He’s just saying he loves you.” He cooed, reaching a disgustingly high-pitched level. George didn’t think a dog could have anymore clear disdain for someone as that dog did for Dream.  
“He’s gonna kill me, but we’ll help you take care of it until we can get him to a vet.” Dream said surprising Sapnap.  
“Thanks guys, I’m really kinda lost. The vet lady told me some stuff we need to feed him, but I’ve never had a dog before.” He muttered. Dream and George grabbed the bags that Sapnap had entered the apartment with while he carried the dog over to the living room. When the other two came into the room with the bags Sapnap sat down on the floor with the dog in his lap. He figured they had to feed the dog who looked to be on the thin side for a puppy.  
After being hit by Sapnap’s car, lightly of course, the only visible injury the dog had was a slight limp. Honestly he didn’t hit the dog that hard and it came out of nowhere.   
“So how about you feed it and Dream and I will run it a bath.” George decided already on his way out of the living room with Dream in tow. “I’m gonna be honest I’ve never taken care of a dog before, but it can’t be that hard. Literally everyone has a dog. It’s gotta be pretty much the same as a cat, right?” Dream nodded his head looking lost for words. His mind drifted to Patches who he was sure was hiding in one of their rooms.   
When they entered the bathroom George started the water and then checked the temperature while Dream sat on the edge of the tub next to him. Shortly after they get a decent amount of water in the tub Sapnap walks in with the dog in his arms. Dream moved from the edge of the tub quickly, electing to put as much distance between him and the rabid flea hotel as possible.   
“Dream don’t you think you’re being a little bit dramatic?” Sapnap chided, lowering the dog into the water that only seemed to make it even happier. George grabbed a cup from the sink and started rinsing the dog off.   
“Uh no, I’m not. Dog’s hate me. Or at least that one does.” He mumbled the last bit watching the muddy water swirl down the tub drain.  
“Is it foaming at the mouth!” George shrieked suddenly at the sight of drool pooling from between the dogs teeth. He moved next to Dream on the other side of the bathroom. What the fuck did Sapnap bring home?  
“No stop! He just likes the water. It’s fine.” He responded, affectionately rinsing said dog. “Plus you can only get rabies from them if they bite you.”  
“He licked me! Sapnap if he gave me rabies I’m giving it to you!” George yelled, panicking. He really liked that elbow and if he had to get it cut off because of rabies he was gonna make sure Sapnap had just as much of a shitty experience.  
“Now you’re being dramatic.” Dream laughed. George smacked him lightly on the arm already regretting the offer to help with the situation.   
“Yeah Georgie look at him, he’s just a little guy.” Sapnap cooed holding the now towel-wrapped dog up close to George’s face. The eldest quickly turned and left the cramped bathroom.  
“So, if that’s all you needed help with then I’m gonna head back to bed.” George said, starting to walk down the hall towards his room.  
“Wait,” Sapnap stopped him. “I have a couple things in the car I have to grab, but it’s too much for me to carry. I need you and Dream to come down with me and grab the stuff.” He pleaded, setting the dog down on the couch while Dream protested about their ‘nice’ furniture being ruined. George groaned loudly, but he already knew he’d go with them to help anyways.  
“How much stuff did you buy this dog?” Dream asked, Sapnap just laughed and mumbled a quiet not much. George started out the front door while Sapnap and Dream followed him out. Once they were at the stairwell of the apartment building the youngest of the three started to get nervous.   
“Do you think he’ll be okay in there by himself?” He asked worry lacing his voice.   
“What could he possibly get into in the ten minutes while we’re gone?” George demanded, the lack of sleep was getting to him and it took everything in him to not snap at the other guys. Sapnap just shrugged in response.  
After they had grabbed everything from the car, which included a dog bed, crate, and water bowl plus many grocery bags full of toys, they headed back up the steps. However once they got to the hallway their apartment was at they stopped dead in their tracks.   
The door was wide open….  
“Fuck.” Dream said exactly what everyone was thinking.  
It didn’t take long for the three of them to split up scouring every inch of the apartment (just in case the dog didn’t leave) and that floor of the building, but they all came up empty-handed.   
“There’s no way he can open the stairwell door, right?” Dream asked to which the other two just stared at him in awe of the dumb question.   
“Maybe someone didn’t see him and let him out when they were going downstairs?” George offered, searching for an answer. Sapnap shrugged.  
“Either way we need to split up and check all the floors.” He said already moving down the hallway to the stairwell while George and Dream decided where to go from there.  
————————————————————————————————  
If Dream knew it wouldn’t eat away at his soul to just abandon this ugly dog and go back to bed he would, but unfortunately he had a conscience. So here he was pacing the halls of their below average apartment building, looking for the most mobile threat to human safety since the last time a volcano erupted. He wasn’t mad at Sapnap, the dude’s heart was too big to leave a small, defenseless animal on the side of the road injured. Regardless of how god-ugly the damn thing was.   
It was almost as soon as he had that thought that he saw the dog sleeping in the middle of the hallway. He was so ready to get the whole situation over with that he grabbed the dog without thinking. Before he had any time to think about his actions the dog turned around and bit him on the hand. Hard.  
“Jesus fucking Christ!” He yelled quickly yanking his hand back as he watched the dog sprint down the hallway toward the open stairwell door. “Fuck.” As he stood there clutching his now bleeding, potentially rabies infected hand to his chest he decided that he was just going to let George and Sapnap handle this one before he lost one of his fingers. With that thought in mind, he defeatedly decided to head back to their shred apartment.  
—————————————————————————————  
George wasn’t having any luck finding this damn dog and next time he saw Sapnap he wasn’t sure if he could stop himself from physically assaulting the men. Most of their neighbors were leaving their apartments for work seeing as it was six in the morning at this point and he’d spent so long looking for this dog that he was sur he was sweaty and gross and in nothing but pajamas. He was just about to quit and tell Sapnap that someone must’ve taken the dog with them when he saw the little guy crouched under a table dispensing coffee on the second floor.   
He slowly crept towards it so as not to startle the dog and gently held his hand out for the dog to sniff. Surprisingly the dog did not immediately eat his hand but instead gave it a small lick much like his elbow earlier that morning. Deeming it safe, George grabbed the dog, and just as he was about to pull it towards him it let out a high pitched bark. It was so unexpected that it sent George up in shock causing him to slam his head on the table.  
Nearly being knocked out on a table is just as embarrassing as it sounds,even though none of their neighbors were in the hallway at that moment George knew it would be on the CCTV footage. After finally regaining his senses he peeked back under the table to find that the dog was long gone.   
“FUCKING HELL.” He groaned before deciding to take a break and lay down on the floor until his dizziness subsided. If anyone deserved to head back to the apartment to take a break before the search continued it was George who just almost brained himself on a cheap table.  
—————————————————————————————-  
Dream was only in the apartment for a few minutes when George walked- or really stumbled through the front door. Being in the middle of washing off his bloody hand Dream couldn’t help him.  
“What happened to you?” He asked the brunette who sighed loudly and flopped dramatically onto the couch.  
“I think the dog gave me a concussion.” He stated simply. Dream nodded solemnly before holding up his punctured hand in solidarity.  
“I’m pretty sure he gave me rabies.” With that comment he moved towards the cabinet that kept all their medicine and bandages. He grabbed a roll of bandages for himself and two Tylenol for George’s soon to be headache. Taking both things over to the couch he placed the pills in George’s waiting hand who swallowed them dry.  
“Here, give me the bandages and I’ll wrap your hand.” The brunette said as Dream took a much needed seat next to him.  
“Thanks. I feel bad for bailing on Sapnap, do you think someone took the dog?” He asked while George gently wrapped his hand up while examining the two angry red, but shallow holes in the blonde’s hand. They weren’t too bad, they just looked painful.   
“I feel bad too, but I can’t really be much help until I stop seeing double at least.” He muttered, rubbing his forehead gently, having finished fixing Dream’s hand.They waited a few minutes to try to gain their bearing after basically being assaulted by a puppy. Just as they’re about to get up and return to helping Sapnap, the front door opens.  
Sapnap walks into the apartment holding the dog in his arms. Of course.  
“Oh hey guys. Guess where he was?” He asked joyfully before making sure the door was shut and then setting the dog down.  
“Murdering someone in the stairwell?” Dream said at the same time that George said, “Second floor Giving out concussions.”  
Sapnap laughed loudly, “No, he was waiting right outside our door! He must’ve looped around after we checked everywhere.”   
Now George had never been a man of violence, but god he wanted to strangle Sapnap and that dog so bad right in that moment.  
“No. That little FUCK, bit me. He nearly knocked George out, and you’re telling me he was just chilling by the front door??” Dream demanded, he was on the verge of sanity and his throbbing hand was gonna push him over the edge if he didn’t get that dog out of his sight.  
“He was probably just playing.” Sapnap wrote them off while ushering the dog into the crate they had bought. Dream was about to object more about how horrible the dog was when George cut in.  
“It’s fine, let's just get him to the vet and then we’ll get rid of him.” He mumbled tiredly before following Sapnap out the front door. Dream left as well, opening the doors along the way because Sapnap was holding the crate and George was potentially concussed.   
The car ride felt like ages, but when they finally got to the vet everyone’s spirits lifted.   
“Fuck you, I hope I never see you again.” Dream whispered to the dog once Sapnap got out of the car to go around and grab the dog.  
When they walked into the vet it was nearly empty due to the early time.   
“Hi, you must be the guy who called earlier, Nick, right?” The lady at the front asked.   
“Yep, that’s me.” Sapnap supplied, setting the dog carrier on the floor of the vet before starting to sign in.   
“Be careful when you grab him, he bites.” Dream grumbled bitterly holding up his bandaged hand as evidence. The lady nodded, stifling a small giggle. George took a few steps towards the door to sit on a bench while the lady came around the front desk to get the dog out. However as soon as she opened the door she shut it.   
“Where did you find him?” She asked, confusion and worry in her tone.  
“Down the street on Willem road, why? Is something wrong with him?” Sapnap asked, heavily invested at this point.  
“No, there’s nothing wrong with him, but this isn’t a dog.”  
“What?”   
“It’s a coyote pup.” She said, starting to laugh. “And if it bit you should make sure you have your rabies vaccination.”   
Sapnap started laughing hysterically as Dream paled. Eventually after the shock of the situation worse off George also burst into laughter.  
When everyone sobered up the lady assured them that they’ll take care of the coyote and that they didn’t have to worry themselves anymore with it. After Sapnap promised to call to check on the condition (can you blame him he gets attached easily) they went to the car.  
“How the fuck did you not know you were stealing a coyote?” Dream demanded incredulously.  
“Hey fucko, you guys didn’t notice either so don’t even go there.” Sapnap retorted.   
Before the hostility could grow George interrupted.  
“Stop. Here’s what we're gonna do. We’re gonna got to the ER to make sure Dream doesn’t have rabies and then we’re going the fuck home and if any of you prevents me from sleeping you’re gonna wish that the coyote had given all of us rabies.” Everyone quieted down and they pulled out of the parking lot with a new end goal in mind.


End file.
